Giving birth without my mom

In March 2021 I gave birth to my first child. I was allowed to have only one support person with me during my entire hospital stay – no switching out, either. Of course my husband had priority but I also desperately wanted my mom with me. (If I had tested positive for covid I wouldn’t have been allowed any support people. I still have the Visitor Guidelines paper from my hospital packet.)

Women in my family often have tricky first births, with pre-eclampsia, stalled labors, and unplanned C sections. I was absolutely terrified of giving birth. Being told by a nurse at one of my last prenatal appointments: “You will be expected to wear a mask anytime a staff member is in the room, except when you’re pushing” didn’t help, either.

Everything turned out fine. My labor and delivery went well and my baby was perfectly lovely and healthy. I didn’t wear the mask, no one said a word about it. But I still cry whenever I think about how my own mother wasn’t allowed to come see me at all.